Ranking the Cities we have lived in
Disclaimer – The views expressed in this blog are mine and mine alone and are 100% correct, no matter what Brooke says.
I am a sucker for rankings…. Football rankings, Star Wars power rankings, presidential hairstyles rankings, I’m here for it. Due to this addiction to rankings, I have decided to rank all of the places we have lived. Brooke and I have had the pleasure to have moved around the country a few times for work, school, and family, and we are blessed to have had experiences in every place we have lived. I intend to in this blog give some highlights, some low lights, and a best restaurant in every city. Ain’t no use in a grand entrance, let’s get into it. Please note, one of these cities isn’t ranked like the others (Looking at you COLUMBUS).
#1 – Kansas City, MO (Plaza Area)
Coming in HOTTT out of the gate is the Plaza area of Kansas City. The Plaza is(was) the fancy part of Kansas City right in between downtown and the burbs to the south. This area is home to the likes of Patrick Mahomes, Andy Reid, and the guy who owns Russell Stover Chocolate, along with a multitude of Post-grads and Rich folks that don’t feel the need to own a big house. With shops, bars, restaurants, cigar bars, yuppie food, and all kinds of stuff to do, it is definitely the place to be of the southside of Kansas City. This was Brooke and I’s first home away from home, and our first apartment after college. We lived in a newly “Renovated” high rise apartment right off of 47th street, above a bar and a fancy steakhouse. This was such a simple time on our lives with our only worries being when my buddy Flores was going to cut out of work early and drive down and drink fireball and eat steak with us. One of the biggest pluses of living in downtown KC is that everyone there is a transplant, and everyone is looking to make new friends, so we were able to quickly develop a wonderful friend group, that we still have to this day (shout out KC crew!).
Cons - The plaza over the past few years has become fraught with crime with groups of teenagers getting dropped off by their parents to come and indulge in some unsupervised mischief. As we were enjoying our rooftop bar at our apartment, we started hearing some loud banging, and we looked over the railing and saw a gang of about 15 hooligans jumping on the roof of our friend Jonboys car, rendering the car virtually undriveable (RIP Caroline).
Best restaurant – Cupinis Italian
#2 – Monroe, NC
Ahh, home! Our current hometown (and my forever hometown) is the bustling metropolis of Monroe, NC. The people here are really what make this town. Even from my childhood, this truly is the quintessential American town. Monroe has had meteoric population growth since the early 2000s due to the construction boom in both Charlotte, and Union County. With changes comes pros and cons. Monroe is a good place to raise a family with good schools, good churches (shout out Lee Park), and improving infrastructure. The downtown area used to be an “avoid at all costs” type place, but in the past few years, the downtown has turned into an awesome, small-town spot. With bars, and restaurants popping up left and right, it’s hard to see a path that Monroe could ever return to the old days. They have a lot of festivals downtown like Brewfest, where I’ve had a few to many beers along with Uncle Kennon. One of the biggest Pros is that we are so close to Charlotte that we get all of the amenities, healthcare, concerts, and food that a big city has to offer, without having to live in the maze that is suburban Charlotte.
Cons – Monroe, while its improving, still hasn’t made that leap from small, post-textile mill town, to lively yuppie-filled suburb. There are truck shows at the Cookout every Friday night from those kids that perm their hair, then wear a Sitka hat that’s 3 sizes too small in a squatted 2004 Silverado that has Morgan Wallen blaring at an ear shattering level. I am proud to be a Monroe-ite, however, it’ll never get better unless someone says something. Monroe has placed a lot of emphasis on projects around town, that don’t do much good for anyone. They are allowing too many new tract-house communities that ruin the old town charm of the area, and it makes traffic unbearable. It also has the age old problem of small towns, that the vast majority of people that live here, are from here and have very little incentive to go out and meet new people.
Best restaurant – Roughedge Trading Co (Chicken and taters are back next week)
#3 – Greensboro, NC
I.Peaked. In. College. There was a time in my life when I only had a 1 5/8 chin as opposed to a double chin. This is the town where Brooke and I met, were married, and made lifelong friends through school, work, Fraternities, Sororities, Fishing, and there is no other place like it. Greensboro truly is the biggest, small town in the country. Even though it is one of the larger cities in North Carolina, it feels like you only have 1 degree of separation to everyone in town. The bar scene in GSO is legendary! The Corner Bar, owned by TikTok Prince Kenny Giard is a once in a universe type bar. Led by the magical Mike Decker and the merry band of Bouncers and Bartenders, if you’re going to GSO, make sure to stop in and get a Big Als Red Hot (Fireball and Cheerwine). In addition to CB, we spent time at Hopps Burger Bar, Old Town Draught House, Yum Yums, Kioskos, Slices, and a bunch of other eat and drinkeries. While the food scene is first class, there is also a bunch to do if you’re an outdoorsman. With Randleman Lake, Washburn Lake, and countless semi-private ponds and lakes around town, you can fish until you don’t want to fish anymore. It ain’t illegal to fish anywhere if you don’t get caught!
Cons – Outside of the campuses of the, what seems like 30, schools in GSO, crime is a real problem. With any town of that size, there are no-go zones that are just dangerous. In addition to some bad areas, there are some dying parts of town. The area around the mall, looks like one of those post-soviet Belarus documentaries. Everything is abandoned and run down, and it shows. Another con is with GSO being a college town, the town never really quiets down. For a college student, it was really fun, but as a quasi-old, very grouchy, 30 something, I could certainly see how it would get old.
Best restaurant – Mimi’s Kitchen (probably not the best food, but the best memories)
#4 – South Kansas City (Waldo area)
Even though we lived only about 5 miles from our original apartment, it was a totally different world. Waldo is much more prototypical suburbs. We moved down to gain more square footage (went from a 400 sq ft apartment, to a palatial 2bd 2bth 1000 sg ft apartment) and to possibly start a family. Waldo was a great place to start that family with a lower cost of living than the plaza, and certainly cheaper than Ward pkwy; better access to major highways for travel, and most importantly, way closer to “the good Walmart”. We had EVERYTHING within a ¼ mile of our apartment. From grocery stores, to good food, good bars, an OfficeMax, and a taco bell, we had it right at our fingertips. We loved some of the local food options like Ugly Joes, Waldo Pizza, and all of the BBQ Joints that inhabit South KC. One thing to do when you’re down that way is to go over to the Kansas side and find the dog park in Leawood. It is a well maintained, and fun way to spend a Saturday morning in the spring. In south KC you also have all of the amenities of Overland Park KS. OP has the Apple Store, the Costco, and an awesome big and tall shop (the name is escaping me).
Cons – There isn’t a plethora of cons outside of normal burb cons. Nothing is walkable, so if you’re planning on getting a little lit up, you better secure an uber (drink responsibly). People are more spread out so there’s less meeting people opportunities. Being so close to the highway, there is a lot of traffic coming out of the more populated city center to get to 435. Cons are minimal, but the pros aren’t sky high either.
Best restaurant – Waldo Pizza
#5 – Mooresville, NC
Mooresville is the Uppity Lake suburb of Charlotte. With the town built around Lake Norman, and NASCAR, it is a pretty happening place. Lake Norman is probably the most utilized lake in the Carolinas by both fishermen, and those idiot jet skiers. In all honesty, Norman is the best part of Mooresville, giving the town the good restaurants and bars on the water, as well as the ability to go out on the water with the family. In addition to the lake, a bunch of the race teams and racing schools are up in Mooresville, so you may just see some of the new boys of NASCAR in the barbershop, or at Walmart. One really unique place in town is the Mooresville Antique Mall (go ahead, take my man card, I like antiquing). The building was originally a giant textile mill, that has since been converted to a monumental, compartmentalized building that houses some of the coolest and most coveted antiques in the state. There is also a Costco right in the middle of town, so you’re never more than a few minutes from a $1.50 hot dog and a 150ct pack of socks. The city is very clean, safe, and with great schools, we had planned to start our family there until we moved back to Monroe for family reasons.
Cons – The traffic… My god the traffic. We lived less than 6 miles from the boat launch, and it would take us upwards of 35 mins to get there. Mooresville has an embarrassment of riches with huge population growth, but with that, more cars are on the road. Another con is that outside of the lakefront bars, there are very few options for nightlife. I’m a big fan of dumpy (but clean) sports bars, and there just isn’t really those options there.
Best restaurant – Lancaster’s BBQ
#739 - Columbus, OH
Whelp. I knew I’d have to rank this place, but I didn’t anticipate the emotional toll it would take to remember it. In all seriousness, Ohio is just not the place for us. We moved to Ohio in the summer 2019, and by November of 2019, both Brooke and I knew that we needed to get out. We lived in Hilliard (NW Columbus) and my business took me to Toledo, and neither of those cities were anywhere we wanted to be. Ohio is gray (skies and ground) for roughly 6 months of the year, and that made for a very dreary existence. Another huge problem with Ohio, is that everyone who lives there is from there, and there isn’t any reason for anyone to branch out or try to meet other people. We were lucky that we found a very select group of a few people that even though they were native Ohioans, they brought us into their friend group and we were able to have some human interaction. The weather, in addition to being gray, is colder than cold. When we lived in Kansas City, we experienced 15 and 20 below freezing, but somehow, it felt twice as cold in Ohio. The snow would stick around for weeks after the initial storm, making travel around the state incredibly difficult for someone who didn’t grow up in the snow. The highways were constantly inhabited by F1 wannabes and semi-professional lane changers, and 3 tractor trailers for every personal vehicle. It is a sad state of affairs when I looked forward to driving through West Virginia, to get back home.
All of that being said, there is 1 absolutely horrendous, and abhorrent quality about Columbus that cannot be overlooked, Ohio State University. These delusional fans, that have little to no regard for the sanctity of either football, or decency. The horseshoe is a joke. The idolization of a small leaf and a nut is beyond any normal comprehension. Ohio State is called “Ohio State” not “THE”.
Pros – Buffalo Wild Wings was started in Columbus, and the quality of the BDubs in town are, on average, higher than normal.
Best restaurant – Bdubs #1